Little Lost Soldier
by Jennifer Collins
Summary: Tesla gave him back Natasha, but even though he has everything he ever wanted, something is still haunting the Winter Soldier.
1. Chapter 1

Tesla looked over her shoulder for a split second before taking his hand. In her other, she grabbed the arm and focused on the escape. Behind them, the world glowed orange and yellow and the force of the explosion pushed them forward for just a moment… and then they were falling, down, down…

"I've instructed the tessaract to restore her memories. Now you are truly free," she informed him as they fell.

"What?! I told you, that's not your decision!" He shouted.

She smiled a tight-lipped half smile. "And it was never for you to decide either, my dear James."

They were both quiet the rest of the time that they fell. After awhile, he noticed that they were going to hit water and he braced himself for the impact. He felt Tesla struggling to free her hand from his and he attempted to hold on tighter.

"This was never my destination," she explained as she pulled her hand from his grasp. "Only yours."

"It doesn't have to be this way," he insisted, almost pleadingly. "You could come with me."

The expression on her face told him that she couldn't, and he bowed his head in defeat as they plunged into the river.

"You'll be okay," she said as she swam upward while he was still trying to catch his breath. "And so will I. Oh, and you'll probably want to stop by S.H.I.E.L.D. I have another surprise waiting for you."

He was about to ask her what she meant by that, but when he turned around, she had gone, leaving him to sputter the water out of his lungs alone.

XXXX

He sat on the bed in her temp quarters at S.H.I.E.L.D., idly inspecting the new arm that Nick Fury had just attached for him.

She winked at him, her long red hair shining in the early morning sunlight that was peeking through the lone window as she pulled on her regulation jumpsuit.

*"Natasha…" He called, and she turned around to face him. He rushed the two long steps forward to close the distance between them, his hands sliding up to her face as he kissed her.

She laughed when he reluctantly pulled away, placing a finger over his lips. "Hey now, loverboy—We don't have all day," she warned.

"I know," he said quietly, running his flesh and blood fingers through her hair. "I just needed a moment."*

She nodded, letting her hands linger on his chest for a moment as she lazily dragged them down from his face. "Fury wants to see us ASAP. Says it's urgent," she said. "There'll be more time for this later, I promise," she added with a wicked grin. She slipped her fingers through his and led him down the hall to the meeting room.

"Natasha," Fury said with a genuine smile as they entered. "Barnes, glad ya made it back alright."

He nodded once in acknowledgement.

"Seems we still have a lot to discuss about the conclusion of yer mission," Fury said.

Bucky shrugged. "I'll tell you whatever you want to know."

"Right. Anyway, there's someone here wants ta see you two. Agent Sitwell, if you please," he called over his shoulder.

Bucky's head snapped up to attention as the smaller agent swiftly stepped into the room, dressed in full, neatly pressed regulation S.H.I.E.L.D. attire.

"Jasper!" Natasha shouted, throwing herself into his arms and embracing him fiercely.

Sitwell's face flushed slightly as he eagerly returned her embrace, and if it was a little too eager, James barely noticed through his shock. "How-how is this possible?" He uttered.

"Barnes," Jasper moved closer to him, holding out his hand and Bucky engulfed it in a firm handshake.

"Is this real?" Natasha wondered, tracing a hand down the other agent's arm and gazing at him thoughtfully.

"Sure is," he said with a smile.

"The Electric Ghost," James muttered, his mouth still hanging half-open. "She did this."

"Who?" Sitwell asked.

"It doesn't matter," Natasha said, shaking her head. "All that matters is you're alive, and I didn't kill you."

"Yeah, about that…." Sitwell said.

Natasha bit her lip. "I'll buy you lunch?"

He pretended to think it over for a moment before answering, "Fine."

For a moment, the reality of everything she'd done flashed over her face and James moved to reach for her, thinking that was a look he knew all too well, but then Jasper was squeezing her hand and she quickly composed herself.

James lowered his eyes to the floor, barely hearing Fury's brief dissertation on next steps.

XXXX

Natasha lounged lazily on the couch in her quarters, flipping through some channels on the television without really paying attention to what was on. James could feel her eyes on him as he cleaned his weapons at the table.

"Getting ready for work so soon?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.

He shook his head. "Nah. I'm actually taking some time off."

She nodded. "I figured as much."

"You?"

She shrugged. "I've locked myself into this whole Secret Avengers thing with Clint and Coulson." She thought for a moment. "You know, Commander Hill has hinted more than once that she'd want you on the team…"

"Yeah… the whole mind wipe thing? Doesn't really work so well for me," he said, watching her carefully. "Besides, I'm still a dead man, remember?"

"See, that's the thing. Everyone goes through adjustments after every assignment, so technically your cover wouldn't be blown," she pointed out. "Besides, it could be fun. Us working together again."

He smiled a half-hearted smile.

"So you'll think about it?" She patted the space next to her on the couch. "Why don't you take a break and come sit?"

He crossed the short distance from the table and obediently sat down. "What are we watching?" He asked, deliberately keeping a cautious distance.

"I haven't the slightest idea," she murmured, studying him. She scooted closer to him, taking note as his body tensed. "Why are you acting so weird?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Ever since you got back from the satellite. You're not yourself," she said.

He frowned. "Do you remember anything from before I left?"

"The whole brainwashing thing with Leo? Of course I remember. That's what this is about? You're angry that I forgot you?" She placed her hands on her hips.

"Of course not. That wasn't your fault. None of it was." He regarded her thoughtfully. "Nobody knows that better than me."

"James… " she placed her hand on top of his. "You walked away from me?"

"I-I couldn't hurt you anymore."

She nodded. "I know that. I know how you think. So what now?"

"Nat… I don't… I don't have the strength to walk away from you."

"So don't," she whispered, pulling his head down to rest on her lap.

"I'm sorry," he whispered back, closing his eyes as her fingers parted his hair. "I'm so, so sorry.."

"Ssh," she soothed. "It's alright. It's just how it is, with us, right?"

He nodded.

"So no more acting weird," she demanded.

He turned his head to look up at her. "Where do we go from here?"

"I don't know. The same place we were always going, I suppose."

"I mean, what do you want?"

She leaned down over him. "The same thing I've always wanted. You. And if you're not yet comfortable taking control, then I guess I'll have to," she murmured, placing her lips against his as she adjusted herself flat against his chest.

He moved his hands up to her face, pulling her in closer as he kissed her thoroughly.

"See that? It's easy to get back," she said, smoothing his hair back with both hands.

"Easier than I thought," he agreed.

"Right. So if you don't relax, I'm going to have to use extreme techniques to make you," she said suggestively, lowering her mouth to his neck.

"Mmm, can't you do that anyway?" He asked, leaning his head back with a mischievous grin.

She grinned back as she sank down into the couch cushions with him.


	2. Chapter 2

Bucky rolled over, kicking off the covers as he pulled her body close against his. She sighed into him, raising her lips to his. "Can't sleep?" She murmured.

He grunted a response, leaning into her touch as she ran her hands over his bare chest. "Natasha… " he moaned as she traced his jaw with her mouth, planting wet kisses down his throat.

"No," she said, sucking softly at his collar bone. "Not Natasha…"

His eyes shot open and he jolted upright. "Tesla! What…? Where's Natasha?"

She laughed, it was the first time he'd ever heard her laugh, but he was too angry to notice. "Why don't you tell me? This is your dream."

"I'm-I'm dreaming?" He murmured, panting slightly. "What am I doing, dreaming about you?"

"I don't know," she said with a wicked smile. "But you really seemed to be enjoying what I was doing to your neck." She leaned in closer, tilting his head back with her hands, her breath hot on his skin…

"Wait…" he gasped. "Stop."

"Oh, fine," she said with a frown, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I'm not just dreaming about you. You're in my head," he told her.

She smiled. "Now you get it."

"Are you trying to tell me something?"

"Just checking up on you, I suppose. See, you thought I was your project, but it seems you've turned into mine."

He nodded. "So it was you who gave Jasper back. Why'd you do that?"

She shrugged. "How were you ever going to move on with your widow with all that regret?"

He lowered his eyes. "I guess I'm still trying to figure that part out."

"I see that."

He looked up at her. "So… where are you now?"

"I told you. I'm in your head, dearest James. I think the real question is why do you want me here?"

He frowned. "You mean, I summoned you here?"

"Not exactly. But you did let me in quite easily."

He shrugged. "I guess I was wondering about you. If you escaped okay."

She stood up. "I'm fine. But you're not."

"Where did you go?" He asked, ignoring her observation.

"Somewhere. Far away from S.H.I.E.L.D." she informed him.

"You're not going to tell me."

She smiled. "No, James. I'm not."

"But I'm not going to turn you in," he said.

"I know that. But even so, it's better this way."

"I don't see how."

She raised a hand to his face. "You really should wake up now, my darling. Natasha will be worried."

"Tesla, wait!"

"James! James!" She shouted, gently shaking his shoulders.

He groggily opened his eyes, a confused expression on his face. "Natasha?"

"It's alright, I'm here," she murmured. "Was it another nightmare?"

"Um, something like that," he said, straightening himself up to a sitting position.

She nodded. "So who's Tesla?"

"What?"

"You said her name, in your sleep," she replied. "Who's Tesla?"

"The Electric Ghost," he muttered.

"I see. She's haunting your dreams?"

"It looks that way. But… she's in my head or something."

Natasha frowned. "I guess we should call Nick. See if any of his S.H.I.E.L.D. connections can help flush her out."

He shook his head. "It's fine. I'm fine," he reassured her.

She placed both hands on either side of his face. "You'll tell me if it happens again?"

"Of course."

"Good." She placed a kiss on his nose. "I've got a mission with Clint, but I hope you'll wait here for me until I get back."

He nodded. "Where else am I going to go?"

"Certainly not the apartment. Nick told me you moved out?"

He sighed. "I'll get it together. I promise."

"You better," she said, poking him in the chest. "I need my man in one coherent piece."


	3. Chapter 3

"Why'd you give her back?" He asked, laying down in the soft grass and folding his arms behind his head as he looked up at the sky.

She sat next to him with her legs stretched out, feet crossed at the ankles, idly pulling clumps of blades out. "Why do you ask so many questions?"

He turned his head away from her. "Do you have anything better to do?"

"It's always the same with you," she told him. "No matter what, you never know what to do with yourself, even when things are going smoothly."

He raised an eyebrow. "Using the cube to give Natasha her memories back and resurrecting the dead is things going smoothly?"

"Would you prefer I left it the other way?"

"It's not natural."

"Isn't it?" she rolled over onto her stomach to face him. "Wasn't what Novokov did to her the thing that was unnatural? Doesn't it make sense for her to get her memories back the same way you did?"

"And have her be tortured for the rest of her life? Where's the sense in that?"

"She's not tortured, dearest James. Ask her yourself. It's you who can't let go. No matter what, you can't ever let go. Just like you can't let go of me."

"What?" He asked incredulously. "Don't kid yourself."

She smiled. "You're the one asking questions when you should be out there living your life. Are you telling me that I mean nothing to you?" She laughed loudly when he didn't answer. "There's your weakness."

"Whatever. So why are we here today? And really, Tesla? In a meadow?"

She frowned, gesturing with her hand. "All this doesn't matter. We really could go anywhere you want."

He shrugged. "Here's fine, I guess. So did you come to me, or did I call you?"

"I suppose it's a little of both. We're still connected, somehow. But you not being able to move on in your life doesn't exactly help me go forward in mine."

He sighed. "I guess I just don't know how to make her happy."

"You used to," she pointed out.

"Did I?" He sat up, folding his legs under him. "After the whole thing with Novokov, I realized that I've just been holding her back this whole time. And really, all those times she's had her head messed with? It really was because of me. What if she really is better off without me?"

"Oh, James. You still always assume that everything is about you. That's going to be your downfall."

He shrugged. "Sitwell's in love with her. He told me he wasn't, but he is."

"And… you're afraid she'll just run away with him?" She laughed. "That's not it at all."

"Then what is?"

She placed her hands firmly on his shoulders and looked him square in the eyes. "The same thing it always is, my dear. You're just afraid. Hasn't our time together taught you anything?"

"I'm trying."

"You're not."

"What's it matter to you?" He asked suddenly.

She frowned. "It doesn't."

"Then why do you come to me?"

"Why do you want me to come to you?" She countered, moving a leg over him to straddle his lap.

"I don't. Not like this."

"And yet you don't push me away," she pointed out, leaning down until his back was against the ground and she was on top of him.

"If you really wanted me, you'd be making more of a move than that," he said.

"If I really wanted you, I could've had you on the satellite," she countered.

He shrugged. "I thought it wasn't about me."

She smiled. "It's not. Although I have become quite fond of you."

He grinned. "Really?"

She nodded. "You remind me of a more pathetic version of myself. It's quite fascinating, actually."

He rolled his eyes. "'So, are you going to tell me where you've gone to?"

She thought for a moment. "Would you come looking for me if I did?"

"Probably not," he admitted.

She raised an eyebrow.

"I wouldn't risk the possiblilty of someone else finding you," he explained.

"As if anyone would be able to stop me," she muttered.

He nodded.

"Even so, why do you bother protecting me like that? I've already told you, you owe me nothing."

He shrugged. "I suppose… I'm kinda fond of you too."

"You know I've been messing with your head this whole time, right, my dear James?"

He grinned. "I know. And I'm not your James."

"That's why you're such an easy target, then?"

He was silent.

"Be careful what friendships you hold, dearest. I've already told you what happened to my first friend."

"I guess it's a good thing I'm not afraid of that. Besides, you had your chance to kill me and you didn't take it."

She stood up. "That would be too easy for you."

He stood as well. "Leaving so soon? To where?"

She turned around to look at him with a dry smile. "If it's me you're worried about, then fear not, little lost soldier. I'm a lot closer than you think."


	4. Chapter 4

"Hey, kid. Thanks for meeting with me," Sitwell said, pushing his glasses up on his nose as he took a seat across from Bucky at the local diner.

Bucky nodded. "So what's this about?"

"S.H.I.E.L.D. has set up a temporary living situation for you back at headquarters. Since, you know, what happened with your apartment and all. I'm sure you'll find the room to your liking. Anyway, it's right across from Natasha's."

"Thanks," Bucky said with a smile. "But what's this really about?"

"Actually, Fury wanted me to meet with you. Now that he's in retirement, he thinks it'd be a good idea for Agent Coulson to be your S.H.I.E.L.D. liason," Sitwell answered, watching him closely.

Bucky fidgeted with the sugar packet in front of his hands. "Why can't you be my liaison, Jasper?"

"Because… I'm leaving S.H.I.E.L.D."

"What?" He asked, both eyebrows raised.

"It's true," Jasper said solemnly. "I've gotten an offer from an insurance company."

Bucky chuckled. "You serious, Sitwell? You've been here forever. You're not gonna be happy at some desk job."

"I've already given Director Johnson my notice. I figure it's time for a change. "

He set his mouth in a line. "Wait, this doesn't have anything to do with Natasha, does it?"

Jasper shook his head. "No, it doesn't have anything to do with her."

Bucky looked down at the table. "You haven't been honest with me."

"It really happened very quickly. Once I got the offer, I called Daisy and now here we are. I haven't even been back for that long, you know."

"Not about that," Bucky said, raising his eyes level with Jasper's. "I meant about Natasha."

"Natasha? What about her?" Jasper asked, a little nervously, Bucky noticed.

"You once told me you're not in love with her. But I think you were lying."

Jasper sighed. "Look, Barnes. My feelings for her pale in comparison to yours. I was never going to do anything about it. Not just because I don't think I'd have a chance with her, but out of respect for you. Guy code and all that."

"Cause we're friends, right?"

Jasper smiled. "Right. Which is why I want to make sure you're taken care of at S.H.I.E.L.D. after I go. I think you should give this Coulson guy a shot."

Bucky shook his head. "I'm not gonna work for S.H.I.E.L.D. full-time. But I've always been there when Nick and the others needed me and I guess that's not going to change anytime soon."

"He's not trying to sign you up for a government funded organization, Barnes. I think we all agree that's not the best idea."

Bucky smirked.

"There's something else that he wants to talk to you about."

He sighed. "Oh, right. That Secret Avengers thing."

"Shall I arrange a meeting for you?"

"Nah. I'm not really interested in being an Avenger again."

"Still, I think it's something you ought to think about. At least meet with the guy," Jasper urged.

Bucky narrowed his eyes. "What do you care? You're leaving, or so you say."

"Oh, I'm leaving," Jasper said with a smile. "But still, we are kind of friends and I do think it would be good for you."

"I've heard that before."

"Maybe if you were out of the shadows again, the ghosts would stop haunting you," Jasper said quietly.

His eyes locked on Sitwell's, unblinking. "She told you about that?"

Jasper nodded. "She's just concerned. We all are. What are you thinking?"

"I don't know. Tesla's trying to tell me something, I guess."

Jasper held up a hand to silence him, his other touched the device at his ear. "Hold on, I'm getting a priority transmit from S.H.I.E.L.D."

He leaned back and studied the other man's face, gauging a reaction. "What is it?"

"We've got to get back to base. The Electric Ghost is now in S.H.I.E.L.D. custody."

Bucky's eyes widened.

XXXXX

Tesla sat on the floor of her underground prison cell, a bored expression on her face.

"I'll ask one more time," Agent Sitwell informed her patiently. "Why are you targeting James Barnes?"

"Who says I'm targeting him?" She asked, idly inspecting a broken fingernail.

"I think the better question here is, why did you let yourself get captured, Tesla?" Natasha spoke up.

"Smart woman," Tesla said, looking up at her for the first time with a grin.

Natasha shrugged. "I know the signs. You clearly want to be here. Why? So you can be close to him?"

Tesla laughed. "No wonder he thinks everything's always about him. You people play into that. Make it that way."

"You don't need to be physically close to him," Natasha said. "You're in his head. That's part of your powers, right? What else is there?"

Tesla rolled her eyes. "My powers are beyond your comprehension."

Sitwell's eyes darted to Natasha. He nodded when he caught her gaze.

Natasha moved right in front of Tesla, placing her hands firmly on the bars to her cell. "Why are you targeting James, Tesla?"

She cocked her head to one side. "Is this the part where you tell me to stay away from your man?"

"Of course not," Natasha replied with a cold smile. "My man can take care of himself."

"Great. Then send him down here."

Natasha raised an eyebrow.

Tesla grinned. "I'll tell you whatever you want to know. So long as it's the Winter Soldier asking. Send him down here. Alone."


	5. Chapter 5

"She asks for him everyday," Natasha said from where she was perched on a desk in the meeting room. "It might be the only way to get her to talk."

"I just don't think it's a good idea to give in to her. Who's dictating here?" Jasper responded firmly.

" I kind of want to talk to her," James spoke up.

Natasha patted his back. "And you have no idea why she's targeting you?"

"Um," he said, looking at the floor. "Actually I do."

"Well, what is it then?" Jasper asked.

"I, uh… I killed her father. A long time ago."

"We all have things from our past that come back to haunt us," Natasha said soothingly. "Are you sure you're up for this?"

He nodded. "I'll do it."

"I still don't like it, but what can I do?" Jasper said with a sigh. "There are eighteen cameras within and directed at her cell. We'll have agents standing by with weapons ready just in case."

James nodded.

"Oh, and you probably shouldn't let her have any physical contact with you, just in case," Jasper reminded him.

"Right. "

Natasha kissed him quickly on his lips. "Just try to stay calm. Remember, everything she does is going to be to get a reaction out of you. Just ask the questions and get out of there."

"I got this," he said quietly.

XXXX

He made his way down the last few steps to underground holding and signaled for the guards to leave. Tesla looked up from where she was sitting on the floor when she heard him enter the room, a dry smile on her face. "I was wondering when you'd finally show up," she said. "Are you on the payroll, or is this a casual visit?"

"Nothing I do is casual," He answered quickly.

She grinned. "I'll keep that in mind. Come closer."

He moved in front of her cell and knelt down so his face was level with hers.

She reached out to brush a lock of hair out of his eyes. "You cut your hair," she noticed, trailing her hand slowly along his ear. She frowned. "I kind of liked it the other way better."

"There are cameras on us," He reminded her. "I'm not supposed to let you touch me."

She smirked. "I scrambled the signal on those half an hour ago. But I don't want to get you in trouble," she said, pulling her hand away.

"I don't want to play games," James said in a low voice. "I just want to talk."

"Alright."

"Why'd you do it?"

"Do what?" She asked, feigning ignorance. "Let myself get captured? Do you think it was to see you?"

He shook his head. "You saw my face, all those years ago. I know you know what I did. Why'd you let me go?"

"Ah," she nodded knowingly. "There it is." She leaned closer to him until she was right up against the bars. "I let you go because you're not the man that killed my father," she said softly.

"But I-"

"No," she interrupted firmly. "I thought you were, but that's not who you really are. You're a little lost soldier. One whose life was taken from him…"

"Twice," he added.

"And replaced," she finished. "Just like me. Only worse. At least I knew what I was doing the whole time."

He nodded slowly.

"You're as much a victim as I am," she said, looking him straight in the eyes. "And I do find it difficult not to feel sorry for you."

He shook his head. "I don't want you to feel sorry for me."

She smiled. "I said I find it difficult not to. I didn't say I do."

He laughed. "I don't get it. You were free. Why did you let yourself get captured by S.H.I.E.L.D., Tess?"

Her eyes widened at the nickname.

"Sorry," he murmured.

She placed her hand over his, he hadn't even realized he'd been resting it on the bars until then. "Do not have feelings for me."

"Too late" he whispered.

She shook her head. "No."

"Why are you here, Tesla? Is it because of me?"

She sighed, nodded once. "James, I have to tell you something… and I wanted to do it face to face."

"Okay. I'm here. What is it?" He asked, his voice so low she'd barely be able to hear him if her face wasn't inches from his.

"My father's calculations were incorrect," she started to explain.

He frowned. "What?"

She kept her gaze steady on his. "The cube's powers are not unlimited, and not permanent. They won't hold for much longer."

He froze, his whole body stiffened. "That-that means…"

"I am sorry."

He nodded slowly. "I knew it didn't feel right."

"You mean Agent Sitwell leaving S.H.I.E.L.D.?"

He managed a weak half-smile. "That, and other… things."

She placed a hand on his cheek. "Are you okay?"

"I… will be."

"Because you didn't know how to act after you got her back," Tesla said.

He swallowed hard. "How much time do I have left?"

"Not much," she whispered. "You should probably go to her. Be happy with her, while you can."

He nodded.

"I tried."  
"I know you did," he said. "Doesn't make it hurt any less."

"I know," she replied, her thumb softly stroking his cheek. "But you'll find your way. We all do."


	6. Chapter 6

He paused in front of the door to her quarters before knocking once. "Hey!" She smiled happily as she pulled him inside. "Did you get everything you needed?" She asked.

He nodded. "I did."

"Great. Let's make a report," she said.

He shook his head, reaching out to pull her close against him. "Later," he murmured.

She returned his embrace. "Well, you must have done something right. Tarasova has confessed to stealing and destroying the S.H.I.E.L.D. satellite. They're moving her to the Raft tomorrow." She paused for a moment. "Are you listening to me? James!" she squealed as he playfully nuzzled her neck. "What's gotten into you?"

"I must be crazy about you," he said with a wink as his mouth engulfed her ear.

She laughed as she tilted his head back to press her mouth firmly against his, her arms encircling his neck. She pressed her body closer into his when she felt his eager arms around her waist and she sighed softly into his mouth.

"Nat," he said, gathering all her hair into his right hand and using his metal fingers to comb gently through the tangles. "Are you happy?"

She smiled, tracing the outline of his lips with one finger. "Of course. I have you, don't I?"

"Always," he whispered shakily, placing his forehead against hers and squeezing his eyes shut against the tears that threatened to fall. "Always," he said more firmly.

"Then I'm ecstatic," she replied, leaning in against his chest.

He pressed his lips to her hair, breathing in deeply as he pulled her more tightly against his chest.

"I love you, James Buchanan Barnes," she whispered into his shirt.

"God, I love you," he answered, his lips seeking another hungry kiss. "So much."

XXXX

He tossed and turned in his bed, caught somewhere in an unsettling place between sleep and no sleep. He rolled over, his arm brushing against something soft and he jolted upright in alarm.

"Hello, James."

"Tesla? What the hell?!" He shouted.

She smiled wordlessly.

"Wait… I'm not dreaming. You're really here," he said. "And not in your cell. How did you-?"

She reached out, her hand brushing against his hair and cheek. "You won't tell on me, will you?" She asked with a slight wink.

He shook his head.

"I just wanted to check up on you one last time," she murmured. "But I see you're doing well, since…"

He sighed. "This is the way it's supposed to be. I can't change that, and neither can you."

She nodded once, watching him curiously. "You've already moved on. I'm impressed."

"You're leaving," he said flatly.

"Yes," she confirmed. "And you won't stop me."

"No," he agreed. "But… I don't want you to go."

"I know, dear James," she said, moving an ungloved hand down his neck to caress his shoulder. "I told you not to feel anything for me," she said sadly, her voice almost a whisper.

"And I told you…. it's too late," he whispered back, his heart pounding embarrassingly fast in his chest as he mentally processed the possibilities and attempted to make a coherent decision.

She kept her hands steady on his shoulders as she leaned forward to kiss him slowly. After a moment, he began to kiss her back, and she smiled against his mouth.

"Um, Tess…" he started, reluctantly pulling away. "Your hand… it's heating up."

"Hmm? Oh," she said, releasing her grip on his right shoulder. "It's a currant. Creates a warming sensation wherever I touch," she explained.

He nodded. "That's, um, interesting."

She laughed. "You know, your thoughts are far more entertaining when you're relaxed," she told him. "And I might be tempted to come back and entertain them."

"Is that how you healed me?" He asked, ignoring the suggestion in her tone. "The currant?"

She nodded. "My father gave me my abilities when I was really young."

His mouth dropped open. "You mean your dad… experimented on you when you were young?"

She shrugged. "The sun will be up soon. I supposed I should…"

"Tess…" His voice was almost pleading.

"Easy, James," she said, putting her mouth close to his ear as she she slowly pushed him down against the pillows. "You're not a little lost soldier anymore."

He was silent as he lay back.

"Besides," she whispered, placing a tender kiss on the side of his neck. "If you really need me, or I you… we'll know how to find each other," she promised.

"Where will you go?" he asked.

"I suppose I'll head back home. See what I can rebuild," she said, tracing small circles with her finger in his hair.

He nodded. "I think that's a great idea," he said quietly.

"How about you?"

He shrugged. "I guess I'll just do what I always do. What I know best. And figure out the rest as I go."

She placed a warm hand on his forehead. "Sleep, now, my Winter Soldier," she said softly, and despite the fact that he hadn't been able to fall under easily in over a month, he found it hard to resist.

XXXX

It was late morning when his eyelids fluttered open and he pulled himself out of bed easily, reaching for his phone. "Hello, Agent Coulson? Yeah, James Barnes here. I was hoping we could have lunch today…" He looked over his shoulder out the round window over his bed. He was certain he saw a blue light shining in the distance out of the corner of his eye, but he blinked and it was gone.


End file.
